I honestly never thought I’d be giving a Grammy acceptance speech. And I’m pretty sure no one who’s known me thought I would be either.
Obviously, I have to start by thanking my parents. Sure, you completely hate each other now, but without that fleeting love, I literally wouldn’t exist.
And from there, I’d like to take a moment to thank some very special people. I might not know you personally, but I do know you help me a lot.
Construction workers. Without you, I’d probably be living in a tent.
The Department of Public Works. Roads are a big deal in my life.
Farmers. You know, the whole food thing.
The water authority. You know, the whole water thing.
Plumbers. As above.
The power plant folks. Because this house of cards would be in trouble without electricity.
Electricians. As above.
Truck drivers. The ones who make our clicks on Amazon a reality.
Scientists. You help extend my life expectancy.
Sanitation workers. You help extend my life expectancy too.
The military. You protect us from the whack jobs out there.
Law enforcement. As above, though I could do without the speeding tickets.
First responders and nurses. This one’s pretty obvious.
Writers. Oh wait, wrong list.
Teachers. You taught me a lot.
Thanks to all of you, I get to make art for a living.
Which reminds me—I need to give a shout out to the businesspeople who figured out a way for us to make money doing this stuff. Without you, I’d probably still be making music by myself in my bedroom. Or attending medical school.
And finally, no Grammy acceptance speech would be complete without recognizing the other artist types who worked with me on this project. Together, thanks to all the other people I mentioned, we get to pretend we’re way more important than we really are.
