The other day, I hit rock bottom.
Call it the bottom of a rabbit hole, if you must.
I, on the other hand, will call it exactly what it was—the bottom of a Wikipedia page.
I should have seen it coming, but when this type of thing happens, does anyone?
The clues, in retrospect, were obvious.
The 10 Best Songs From Buffalo.
The 10 Best Songs From Syracuse.
I knew no one cared.
But I couldn’t stop.
I had found my very own Upstate New York sinkhole.
For some reason, I was writing a book about Buffalo.
I was planning a day trip to Jamestown.
I even did a piece for a small magazine in Rochester.
Nothing, however, could have prepared me for rock bottom.
It was July 22, 2025, and inertia—aka procrastination—struck hard.
That, as the saying goes, was the beginning of the end.
And by beginning, of course, I mean the beginning of the Rochester, New York, Wikipedia page.
I knew the place well, obviously. Fifteen years, two kids, and one gargantuan obsession will do that.
But as any Wikipedia reader will tell you, the nuggets keep on coming. (The disorganization hides them well.)
I scrolled down slowly, making sure I didn’t overlook any key information.
I paid special attention to things like land area, population density, FIPS code, and GNIS feature ID.
Then I kept going.
History.
Geography.
Demographics.
Economy.
Arts and culture.
Sports.
Parks and recreation.
Government.
Education.
Media.
Infrastructure.
Notable people.
And finally, Sister cities. There, I took my time, knowing that Sister Cities International often links cities with similar sizes and demographics.
Rochester’s most recent sister was added in 2009. It also happened to be the last entry on the page.
Alytus, Lithuania.
I clicked the link, eager to learn about some exotic locale on the Baltic Sea…except Alytus is nowhere near the Baltic.
The landlocked burg is Lithuania’s sixth largest, which would be noteworthy if the entire country didn’t have a population under three million. Apparently, the place is known for an annual tomato tasting event.
Disappointed at Rochester’s underachieving family member, and afraid that such underachievement was a reflection of Rochester itself, I scrolled through Alytus’ other relatives.
Amata, Latvia.
Berdychiv, Ukraine.
Botkyrka, Sweden.
Crawley, United Kingdom.
Ełk, Poland.
General San Martín, Argentina.
Giżycko County, Poland.
Hiratsuka, Japan.
Kremenchuk, Ukraine.
Mandal, Norway.
Næstved, Denmark.
Ningbo, China.
Opole, Poland.
Ostrołęka, Poland.
Rouen, France.
Suwałki, Poland.
Vélizy-Villacoublay, France.
Not having heard of a single one, that’s when I knew what had happened.
I had officially hit rock bottom.
I flipped back to Rochester’s page.
Fully in the throes of addiction, and despite the pleas of my family, I took one last hit.
See also.
Notes.
References.
Further reading.
External links.
