Quiet? 20 Quips for the Loudmouths in Your Life

Quiet.

From personal experience, I’ve learned that this tag is definitely not a compliment.

In a world designed for loudmouths, thinkers can be mislabeled and left behind.

Just ask Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. In her book, the Princeton University and Harvard Law School graduate brilliantly recaps the rise of the Extrovert Ideal in 20th-century America and shows how that shift has resulted in the underestimation of—and even disdain for—introverts. In exposing the flawed ideal, she helps us understand some of the most thoughtful and understatedly influential members of our society.

 

 

I, along with Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, and a bunch of other entities, highly recommend throwing this one on your list.

But in the meantime, since it’s apparently acceptable to insult a pensive person for a trait that is as ingrained as skin color, here are a few quips for the more verbose personalities in your life.

 

20

I don’t have anything interesting to say—sorry, I meant you.

 

19

Did you know that RUN DMC sang a song about you?!

 

18

You have a lot of thoughts—none of which are very insightful.

 

17

Once you shut up, I’ll start talking more.

 

16

As they say, speak before you think.

 

15

Would you like some Imodium? Because you have verbal diarrhea.

 

14

I found your theme song the other day.

 

13

Am I supposed to care about this?

 

12

You’re gifted—at taking about yourself.

 

11

And an expert—on self-promotion.

 

10

To use an NBA analogy, if speaking efficiency were a stat, you’d be in the G League.

 

9

Oh, you’re a baseball fan. Well, have you heard of the pitch clock?

 

8

Or tennis? You know, the back and forth thing?

 

7

You seem to be a big fan of monologues.

 

6

Were you the inspiration for noise-canceling headphones?

 

5

You have a great ego.

 

4

You’re the best—according to you.

 

3

You remind me why group work sucks.

 

2

Wow…mmhhm…wow…mmhhm…that’s great…wow…

 

1

Wow, you’re really annoying.