Particleist: The New Word Everyone Should Know

Language, as you know, is a living and breathing thing.

Yes, throughout history, humans have had to deal with various sorts of language police who, in the words of linguist Gretchen McCulloch, uphold the prejudices of a bunch of aristocrats from the 18th century.

Thankfully, the internet has largely done away with such snobbery.

And that means that regular people like us can do all sorts of fun stuff with the beautiful languages that we speak.

So I’ve taken the liberty to go ahead and invent a word.

 

Particleist

That’s pronounced particle-ist.

Let’s use it in context first.

My patients would often ask about my religious views, and I would tell them I was a particleist. An atheist? they would ask. No, I would answer. I believe that we’re made of the same particles as everything around us—I’m not as worried about how that came to be.

And now for a few possible definitions.

• A person, or collection of particles, who believes they are composed of the same subatomic particles as everything else in the universe (or multiverse). Such an individual may or may not partake in discussions regarding the origin of such particles, preferring instead to focus on their fantasy football team.
• A person who walks around mumbling words like quark, lepton, and boson and is unlikely to be encountered at a church, temple, or mosque.
• A person whose reductionist take on the human experience serves as a major irritant to those around them.

 

Disclaimers

It is possible, of course, that this word will enter the linguistic abyss, never to be heard from again.

It is also very possible that the word has been uttered elsewhere, completely invalidating the claim of invention.

Regardless, I would like to thank (or is it blame?) the particles in my brain for participating in this endeavor.